The majority of couples that I work with desire to experience the benefits and intimacy of one-flesh marriages. One-flesh marriages are often misunderstood and considered mysterious. Fortunately, the attribute of mutuality guides couples into both the spiritual and practical elements of one-flesh marriages.

The attribute of mutuality in marriage relationships allow couples to:

  • Reflect the Trinitarian unity of the Godhead in husband and wife relationships.
  • Reveal the heart of servant-hood and servant leadership between husbands and wives as ministers of the Gospel.
  • Rulership is recovering the spiritual authority given to married couples to overcome the enemy of their souls and triumph over cultural values that stand in opposition to the values of God’s kingdom.

Mutuality in marriages require couples to never settle for:

  • An attitude of winners and losers in conflict resolution. Conflict resolution must include benefits for each person.
  • Smoothing over issues rather than asking each person to take responsibility for his/her behaviors or attitudes that threaten the values of respect, financial responsibility, trust, integrity, etc…
  • Avoiding conflicts for the sake of keeping the peace at any cost to what is true, righteous, holy, or mutually beneficial to the relationship or family.

Mutuality leads couples to:

  • Avoid analyzing their spouse’s faults in psychological terminology.
  • Avoid taking responsibility for reforming poor or unhealthy behaviors of his/her spouse. Each person is responsible to take appropriate actions and submit to counsel in order to correct unhealthy behaviors and attitudes.
  • Radically love each other in order to express the gifts and benefits of salvation, redemption, and peace to their spouse.